I'm not sure why I want to bare all on this blog. I think I was perfectly fine hiding all my demons from the public (which is really, at this point, a group of my friends). But to write a blog called letting go, while not revealing things that I'm having a tough time letting go of, seems, well, disingenuous and silly.
So K is now 11 months. I actually cannot believe it. In that time from his arrival until now, he has moved rapidly through clothes, toys (well, sort of), accessories, gear, diapers, and eating habits.
We were given/gifted a LOT of stuff, thankfully. It seems to be the way of the world, to give baby stuff away. And I want to stay in that flow. Because it's generous and loving and decluttering (which is a big deal for me)...but what about baby #2? Some things were special/handmade, so that's a no-brainer--KEEP. But other things are simply cute or gender neutral (which works when you won't know the sex of the next kid too) or functional (for a wiggly baby, snaps are the devil and zippered PJs RULE). I want to keep those. I'm sure I won't be faulted, but I feel guilty. Because I should give stuff away. And I didn't need half of the clothes I got (K didn't wear a bunch of stuff--white, made for bigger babies, hard for us to put on him, etc), so that's easy, but I don't want to hog the clothes.
Also, will people feel offended if I give up stuff with stains? I have labored endlessly to keep things stain-free (tie dye clothing isn't just for hippies anymore!), but I feel bad when the stuff I have to give away looks like a baby wore it. ARGH! Part of my perfectionist ways most definitely include, and even highlight, my love of laundry and stain-freeness.
Luckily, when people have given me stuff with the caveat that they want it back, I am more than happy to oblige. I don't want to own most of the stuff, to be honest. And when the kids are old, save a few items that I want personally, I will likely not save much of that stuff. I'll leave the storage in the attic for the millions of art projects that I can't part with.
Okay, that's all. I just wanted to say I'm feeling bad about not giving up my baby clothes yet. And maybe I'm also giving myself permission to hold on to some stuff for #2 (and then giving it up THEN).
It's not all heavy, this letting go. Sometimes, logistics play a part...