Monday, June 17, 2013

What about NOT letting go?

Of course, the blog is about letting go, but should I exclude the idea of not letting go of some things? Maybe not.

With motherhood and parenthood comes excruciating amounts of cutting, severing, allowing, releasing, forgiving, forgetting, surrendering, and more. But in order to not fly away with the wind, I gotta hold on to SOME things, right?

Like what?

I don't know. I just started writing this entry because I feared that I was starting to let go of too much, too soon and then I was also thinking that I wouldn't be able to hold on to anything.

I'm learning that letting go is not an absolute activity. I don't just all of a sudden release, forget, and move on. In fact, letting go is more like a spectrum...what I let go of, how fast it happens, if I try to hold on again, etc., is all a part of the process. If I love something, let it go, and then it comes back, can I hold on again? Or is it just simply a letting out the string of my kite, letting it catch the wind, reeling it in when the wind dies down and then trying again?

Many a song talks about nothing being forever...which is super pessimistic, right? I don't like to think like that. I like to reframe that idea to allow that things just ebb and flow, they come close, then wander off, they hang around in the foreground, then fade to the background when it's time.

Just wanted to allow the parts of me who like to hang on, to be what they are. Not everything can be peacefully let go of. And that's okay too.

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